Character
How Not to Confess Your Sin
Unless you took your honeymoon in August, you’re probably aware that the United States did very well at the 31st Olympiad in Rio de Janeiro–with one glaring exception.
Toward the end of the Games, celebrated American swimmer Ryan Lochte, 32, and three of his younger swimming buddies, gave America a black eye by some atrocious behavior outside the pool.
I was saddened by what happened, but even more troubled by the way Lochte handled it.
I’ve been in numerous settings where I’ve shared with others how to confess their sins. What gave me the authority to do it? Being a sinner myself , making mistakes, learning from them, and also devouring quite a bit of literature on the power of confession and forgiveness.
One thing we can learn from Ryan Lochte is how not to confess your sin.
Let me begin by saying that there are a number of angles to the Lochte saga. According to a recent USA Today, article, it’s probably true that the Brazilian police did a little editing of tape and also did not tell the full story. It’s also true that Mr. Lochte has lost much future endorsement money in the past few weeks when he was quickly dumped by former sponsors Speedo USA, Ralph Lauren and skin-care firm Syneron-Candela.
Bad actions have negative consequences.
I will let columnist Steve Berman share his perspective on how Ryan Lochte and teammates Jack Conger, Gunnar Bentz, and Jimmy Feigen brought shame to America late one night during the Rio Olympics.
“Ryan Lochte needs to man up and fly to Rio. I watched Matt Lauer‘s interview with Lochte and cringed at his statement, ‘I over-exaggerated that story.’ It’s not the regretful words of a 32-year-old man, it’s the excuse of a 21-year-old frat boy; the very frat boy Lochte claims he’s not.”
“These are the facts:
- Lochte went to an all-night party held by the French team and got horribly drunk.
- He and three teammates took a cab ride home around 6 a.m., and stopped for gas and to relieve themselves.
- Unable to get into the rest room, at least one of them forced the restroom door open, or urinated in the bushes behind the station.
- Confronted by security, Lochte pulled an advertising banner from the station’s wall.
- The security guards would not let the swimmers leave until they’d paid, or the police arrived (it’s unclear if they were actually called).
- When Lochte tried to leave, one of the guards drew his firearm and pointed it in the swimmers’ direction.
- The swimmers paid the equivalent of $50 and left.”
“Here’s what Lochte told everyone, starting with his mother:
- We were robbed at gunpoint at 3 a.m.
- The robbers stopped our taxi, ordered us to get out, get down on the ground.
- I resisted, and had a gun put to my forehead and cocked.
- I gave the robbers my wallet.”
“This is not ‘over-exaggerating.’ It’s flat-out lying.”
“Laurer brought Lochte nearly to tears after asking if he realized what he’d done to his teammates. Lochte also admitted he could lose sponsors, and potentially be banned from competitive swimming. Almost certainly, his apology on Instagram was made mostly to keep himself from that fate.”
Lochte didn’t vary much from that statement in his interview with Laurer. But his problem isn’t with USA Swimming, or the USOC, or his teammates, or his sponsors. His problem is with America and Brazil.”
“Would anyone blame Brazilians for protecting the honor of their country as the host country of the Olympic Games?”
“As a Georgian for the past 24 years, I witnessed the Atlanta Centennial Olympic Games. To me, they were a proud embarrassment. Proud because Atlanta, less than 2 hours from my home, pulled it off. They were a great games. Embarrassment, because of the transportation, ticketing, and security problems that were widely reported. And then there was the pipe bomb at Centennial Olympic Park. No effort was spared to capture Erick Rudolph. It took two years.”
“That was the last time the U.S. hosted the summer games. President Obama tried to get the games for Chicago, and made an unprecedented personal appeal. He failed. Ryan Lochte could cost America the summer games: Los Angeles has bid for 2024, along with Rome, Paris and Budapest.”
“Why would the IOC select Los Angeles when American athletes are perceived as lying about an Olympic host country, then fleeing home?”
‘It’s how you want to make it look like. Whether you call it a robbery, whether you call it extortion, or us paying just for the damages, like, we don’t know,’ Lochte responded. ‘All we know is that there was a gun pointed in our direction, and we were demanded to give money.’
‘We just wanted to get out of there,’ Lochte said. ‘We were all frightened. And we wanted to get out of there as quick as possible. And the only way we knew is — this guy saying, ‘You have to give him money.’ So we gave him money, and we got out.’”
“Fortunately, there’s a solution here. Lochte should stop saying he ‘over-exaggerated’ his account in the press. He should tell the truth–he lied to make himself look better. He didn’t care about his teammates, or his country, or swimming at that point. He cared about Ryan.”
“He should get on an airplane–today–clear customs in Brazil, and let himself be taken into custody. He should pay whatever fine they hit him with. Then he should go on Brazilian television and confess his lie. They’re human. They’ll accept it if he gives it sincerely.”
If you have haven’t seen the Lauer interview, you can view it here. I must admit it’s painful to watch. It reminded me of the first time HIllary Clinton tried to explain her secret e-mail server. Both of them danced, swerved, lied, used carefully crafted excuses that meant nothing–and then showed a little contrition to make you feel sorry for them.
But that’s not enough. Here’s what I’ve learned from my own failures about how to confess your sins:
1. Begin by confessing to God. He is the main One you’re sinned against (Psalm 51:4) since all wrong actions are rebellion against His kingdom and ways. Do that in private, receive His forgiveness and ask for His empowering to help make the situation right.
1. Go to the people you’ve harmed and be honest and transparent as quickly as possible (Matthew 5:23-26) . Tell exactly what you did and why you did it. Truth is important to God and has a ring of authority to it that can help to undo the damage (though it will never completely remove the stain).
2. Be humble about your mistake (James 5:16). Don’t make any excuses or rationalize it in any way. Remember this: to rationalize is to tell yourself and the world a rational lie. But it’s still a lie–and adds a second wrong to your already bad behavior. In fact, oftentimes the cover up or justification is worse than the offense itself.
3. Don’t use the cheap words “I’m sorry” when dealing with your guilt. Whenever you sin against someone, look them in the eye, state what you did without justification, and ask them if they will forgive you. Saying you’re sorry focuses on you and can be self-serving–just trying to clear your conscience. Asking their forgiveness (Ephesians 4:32) puts the rightful focus on them and your desire to honor and clear up the hurt. It also gives the other person the opportunity to exercise forgiveness–a beautiful God-quality.
4. Make sure to confess your sin to all those you’ve harmed. If it’s one person, then go to the one. If it’s a group, then confess to the group. In Ryan Lochte’s case, I agree with Steve Berman that he needs to go to Brazil and ask forgiveness of the nation he trashed–also his Olympic teammates, the US Olympic committee, and the world at large that was negatively impacted by his actions. Always confess to the sphere of offense.
5. Do what you can (for the rest of your life) to make restitution for your sin. Ryan Lochte may have lost millions of dollars in endorsement money, but he could spend many years talking to thousands of kids about the evils of drunkenness, vandalism, and lying that could save them from his fate. A great way to restore a reputation is to re-build it again through repentant actions.
Pray for Ryan Lochte to do the right thing. Don’t look down on him. You’ve down similar things–just on the same scale. We’re all sinners who need to learn humility and appropriate grace.
And some of us need a refresher course in confessing our sins.
Whoever Will Be the “Greatest” Among You
Muhammed Ali, one of the world’s best known sports figures, died last week at the age of 74.
After his passing, many broadcasters, athletes, government leaders and entertainers lined up to pay their respects. Ali had famously shouted “I am the Greatest” after winning the heavyweight crown from Sonny Liston in 1964.
The Sunday after Muhammed Ali’s passing, I spoke at a church in Oregon about what the Bible says about being the greatest.
So what is God’s take on Cassius Clay/Mohammed Ali? Was he really the “greatest” and worthy of our adoration and imitation?”
I have to admit that as a young man, I was fascinated by both boxing and Mohammed Ali’s rise to become the heavyweight champion of the world.
But when he died last week, I was greatly saddened by the lack of honest critique of his life, accomplishments and role in history. It’s as if every celebrity and commentator wanted to get on the bandwagon of nostalgia and simply declare him “the Greatest” without any reference to his character or influence.
I will not make that mistake today.
But first, a little history on what I consider the tragic life Cassius Clay/Mohammed Ali who was one of the most recognizable sports figures of our time.
Early Life
Cassius Marcellus Clay, Jr. was born on January 17, 1942, in Louisville, Kentucky. He was named in honor of the 19th-century Republican politician and staunch abolitionist, Cassius Marcellus Clay. His father painted billboards and signs, and his mother was a housewife. Although Cassius Sr. was a Methodist, he allowed his wife to bring up both Cassius and his younger brother as Baptists.
We don’t know how deep his faith went, though he commented in his autobiography:
“My mother is a Baptist, and when I was growing up, she taught me all she knew about God. Every Sunday, she dressed me up, took me and my brother to church, and taught us the way she thought was right. She taught us to love people and treat everybody with kindness. She taught us it was wrong to be prejudiced or hate. I’ve changed my religion and some of my beliefs since then, but her God is still God; I just call him by a different name.”
He was first directed toward boxing by a Louisville police officer and boxing coach who encountered the 12-year-old fuming over a thief taking his bicycle. He told the officer he was going to “whup” the thief. The officer told him he had better learn how to box first.
Clay made his amateur boxing debut in 1954. He won six Kentucky Golden Gloves titles, two national Golden Gloves titles, an Amateur Athletic Union national title, and the Light Heavyweight gold medal in the 1960 Summer Olympics in Italy.
Young Cassius Clay was feisty, mouthy, and a very good boxer.
Professional Career
Clay made his professional debut on October 29, 1960, winning a six-round decision over Tunney Hunsaker. From then until the end of 1963, Clay amassed a record of 19–0 with 15 wins by knockout. In each of these fights, he vocally belittled his opponents and vaunted his abilities. He called Jones “an ugly little man” and Cooper a “bum”. Madison Square Garden was “too small for me.” Clay’s self-centered behavior provoked the disdain of many boxing fans.
By late 1963, he was the top contender for Sonny Liston’s title. The fight was set for February 25, 1964. Clay was a 7–1 underdog. Despite this, he taunted Liston during the pre-fight buildup, dubbing him “the big ugly bear”. “Liston even smells like a bear”, Clay said. “After I beat him I’m going to donate him to the zoo.” Clay turned the pre-fight weigh-in into a circus, shouting at Liston that “someone is going to die at ringside tonight”.
The outcome of the fight was a huge upset. In the sixth round, Cassius Clay dominated, hitting Liston repeatedly. Liston did not answer the bell for the seventh round, and Clay was declared the winner. Following the win, a triumphant Clay rushed to the edge of the ring and, pointing to the ringside press, shouted: “I am the greatest! I shook up the world. I’m the prettiest thing that ever lived.”
He went on to fight for another 16 years, losing the heavyweight title on two occasions and winning it back. Famous fights included his matches with Joe Frazier and George Foreman.
Conversion to Islam
Soon after becoming heavyweight champion, Cassius Clay came under the influence of Elijah Mohammed and the Nation of Islam, converted to the Muslim faith and changed his name to Muhammed Ali. Elijah Mohammed was an evil man–the Osama bin Laden of the day. He was responsible for the assassination of Malcolm X in 1965 and extracted much of Ali’s boxing wealth to advance radical Islam in America.
Ali changed from the Nation of Islam to Sunni Islam in 1975. He went on pilgrimage to Mecca on two occasions–in 1972 and 1988. By 2005, Ali had become more “spiritual” than religious. He embraced Sufi Islam, which means “wisdom”, and is not classified as a religion. In his later life, Ali continued to try and convert others to Islam, but he spent more time doing charity work. His daughter Hana explained:
“It was important for him to be very religious and take the stands he did in earlier years. It was a different time. He still tries to convert people to Islam, but it’s not the same. His health and his spirituality have changed, and it’s not so much about being religious, but about going out and making people happy, doing charity, and supporting people and causes.”
Mohammed Ali also became America’s most famous draft dodger during the 1970s saying “I won’t fight no Viet Cong!” You may not know that he was married four times, had numerous affairs, and fathered at least seven daughters and two sons, some out of wedlock. Those facts did not make the nostalgia reel.
So what is God’s take on Mohammed Ali?
Here are my conclusions based on reflections from the Bible:
1. For much of his life, Ali’s character was opposite of greatness. Jesus likened true greatness to servanthood (Matthew 23:11), humility (Philippians 2:1-11), childlike innocence (Matthew 18:3), and lovingly deferring to others (1 Corinthians 13). Mohammed Ali’s life reeked of egotism and pride.
2. His rebellion against authority (1 Samuel 15:23) and draft-dodging set a bad example in the US, and helped cause the death of many people in Viet Nam. Ali could have been a humble conscientious objector and served in a non-combat role. Instead he publicly led the parade of America’s first defeat in war. The communists won and millions were slaughtered. That’s why the Left adores him.
3. He rejected the Christian faith of his parents (Proverbs 1:8, 9), and embraced radical Islam, then Sunnism, then finally philosophical spirituality. Probably more than any other figure, he lulled America to sleep in the 1960’s about the evils of Islamic jihad–then bailed out himself in later life.
4. Mohammed Ali was an immoral man that used many women and did not live for family values (Ephesians 5:3). His life was about himself–not loyalty to others.
5. He reaped what he sowed from boxing–early-on-set Parkinson’s due to continued trama to the head (Galatians 6:7). He lived thirty years of his life as a pale shadow of himself due to his choice of vocation.
6. He was involved in much philanthropy and seemed to like children. In this way, his life was similar to Elvis Presley’s. He had a big heart and relational gifts that could have been used greatly in the lives of others and for Christ’s kingdom. But pride and destructive behavior limited it.
The Greatest?
So why was there so much Ali worship after he passed? That’s an easy answer.
In our new post-Christian world, he’s a shining worldly (satanic) example: Arrogant, famous, boastful, rebellious, anti-authority, self-consumed, immoral, anti-Christ, pro diversity in religion, and with a veneer of good works.
That makes him “great” in our growing secular society where self expression rules. But not in God’s kingdom where death to self, humility and servanthood are the true measures of greatness.
It is Jesus who is truly the Greatest in what He said, what He did, and who He is (book of Hebrews).
Follow, adore, and imitate HIM.
The Bravest Boehme
brav·er·y (ˈbrāv(ə)rē): courageous behavior or character. Synonyms:courage, valor, intrepidity, nerve, daring, fearlessness, audacity, boldness, dauntlessness, stoutheartedness, heroism.
“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13).
The closest I ever got to serving in the military was when I was drafted for the Viet Nam War and took my physical. At the last medical station I told the doctor I wanted to be a missionary. He looked at my file and said he would declare me 4-F (unfit), exclaiming: “I think God’s army needs more soldiers than man’s army.”
Thus my missions career was launched.
Now forty-five years later, I still have great respect for the military which we recently honored on Memorial Day. As we visited the grave sites, I thought deeply about the only uncle I’ve never met. He gave his life for his country in World War II.
He was the bravest Boehme.
My father was the oldest of six children, born and raised in Akron, Ohio. The second child born to Herman and Lucille Boehme was Richard. I am told that he was smart, athletic, and religious (in their traditional Lutheran home). While in his early twenties, “Uncle Dick” joined the US military and headed out to fight the Germans in the western theatre of World War II.
One day in the spring of 1945, a somber member of the US Army knocked on my grandparents’ door and informed them that Dick was missing in action in Europe. For over a year, my grandmother dried her tears with the hope that Dick would be found and come home. Then came the heart-breaking news. He had been shot down and killed on February 16, 1945–just seven months before the war ended.
For decades, our family was given little information on Dick’s death. Then, in the early 2000s, a man named Jerry Whiting tracked down my father to let him know that he was writing a book in memory of his own dad and all those that served in his squadron–including my uncle. (The book is called I’m Off to War, Mother But I’ll Be Back.)
Jerry Whiting would answer many questions about Dick’s last months on earth.
Whiting spent decades combing through military files and collecting information. He traveled to Europe to interview folks who’s met his dad and “band of brothers” and knew something about their story. They included soldiers, villagers, and even a Catholic priest.
When the book arrived, our family was ecstatic. Finally we would learn what had happened to “Uncle Dick”– a brave member of the 485 Bomb Squadron stationed in Italy. The biggest revelation? He had been shot down three times in the space of five months.
It takes great bravery to keep going under those circumstances. Here’s the story.
October 16, 1944
Dick was captain of a B-28 Liberator that bombed some German military factories in Austria. After failing to fire on the first target due to clouds, the squadron went on to their second priority, the Neudorf Aircraft Factory at Graz. Upon finishing the assignment, they were running low on fuel and would not make it back to Italy. They’d also been hit by incoming “flak” from German guns.
Uncle Dick put out the Mayday signal and all of them parachuted out of the plane as it crashed into the waters off Yugoslavia. One of Uncle Dick’s mates hit the water, swam to shore and was found by a village girl named Narija Glavan who gave him clothes to wear and hid him in a hole in the ground from the occupying Germans.
Uncle Dick landed in the water a few miles from his buddies. The Germans saw his parachute descending and fired at him in the air–but missed. He started swimming, but was caught up in the parachute. Two local Yugoslav cousins, Niko and Nikica Peros, jumped into action from shore. Here’s how Whiting tells the story:
“The Peros cousins saw Boehme struggling in the water…They swam out to Boehme and Nikica cut Boehme free from the parachute lines and both helped him to shore. As they swam, the Germans started shooting at them with machine guns. The Germans were less than a mile away, so the three men got out of the immediate area as quickly as possible.”
“They took Boehme to the village of Zaton. The villagers gave him civilian clothes and hid him from the Germans who were searching the entire area for missing flyers…The villagers refused to betray Boehme, so the Germans shelled the village, ultimately killing a young girl in the barrage.”
Helped on by the locals, Uncle Dick walked, hid, and traveled north for a week staying near the coastline. He was finally smuggled onto some islands and evacuated to Vis. From there he returned to Italy where he was awarded a Silver Star.
November 17, 1944
Three weeks later, Uncle Dick volunteered for another combat mission. His plane was again shot down while returning from Blechhammer, Yugoslavia. Details are scarce are this mission, but he eventually found himself in the midst of a battle between Chetniks and Partisans. On the run for a month, he finally made a safe return to Italy one month after his second crash.
The Final Mission: February 16, 1945
Uncle Dick was once again captaining the squadron when, after bombing their target, they came under heavy anti-aircraft fire in the vicinity of the Italian/Austrian border. Whiting describes the scene as two aircraft were fatally hit:
“Both planes broke apart after the mid-air collision. The tail was sliced off Tomhave’s plane (piloted by Uncle Dick) and part of the nose broke off. Major Olen Cooper Bryant (the navigator) was thrown through a hole in the nose of the plane, unconscious from the concussion of the direct hit. He fell from an altitude of about 10,000 feet without a parachute, landing in heavy snow.”
Miraculously, Bryant survived! Others parachuted from the two doomed planes–but not my uncle. The planes crashed near each other below the crest of Mount Belepeit, near the Slovenian border in northern Italy–west of the village of Chiusaforte. Those who lost their lives were John Carmody (navigator), James Cahen III (navigator), Marvin Woodcock (bombadier), James Dixon (flight engineer), Bruce Graves (radio operator), and Captain Richard Boehme (pilot).
Uncle Dick was 23 years old.
On February 27, 1945, after ten days of severe weather, Father Giovanni B. Lenarduzzi led twenty-five local villagers up the mountain to locate the remains of the American airmen and give them a proper burial–near the summit of Mount Belepeit. We, their relatives, are deeply grateful.
In the past forty years, a number of the villagers have made an annual trip up the mountain to honor the American flyers were fought for their freedom. My dad’s letters contain e-mails from those folks–one as recent as 2005–which shows the tree-lined hillside of the mountain (in summertime) and numerous remains of the crash that are buried beneath the leaves and vegetation.
My uncle was a hero. He loved his God, family, and nation and gave his life that we might enjoy ours.
I think now of what Uncle Dick might have done if he lived past 23. Would he have become a doctor, pharmacist, office manager, or logger like his older brothers? Would he have moved to the west coast with the rest of his family? Had children, grandchildren? Lived into his nineties like his older brother, my dad?
How would he have continued to serve the God of his fathers? He never had that chance. He laid down his life for others–just like his Lord did for the sins of the world.
Let’s never forget the heroes. Let’s emulate their faith and commitment. In my latter years, I want to be brave like my Uncle Dick.
I’ll always consider him the bravest Boehme.
He also lived the shortest life–23 years.
Dick was a fighter pilot in Europe during World War II. We found out sixty years after his death that he was shot down three times in his service of America. The first was on October 16, 1944 after a bombing mission over Austria. He parachuted into the Adriatic Sea, was miraculously rescued by a local villager, and hidden from the Germans until he escaped to safety.
One month later, on November 17, 1944, he was again shot down over Yugoslavia and had to spend a month running from the Nazis before making his way back to Italy.
On February 16, 1945, his squadron was hit for the third time and one of his own aircraft tore off the wing and tail of his plane. One of the crew members was thrown from the burning cockpit and fell 10,000 feet without a parachute into a snowbank high in the Alps–and lived! He told the story of the squadron that was published in two books sixty years after these heroic young men gave their lives.
Dick died in the third crash. His body was buried on the hillside by grateful villagers and some of his remains eventually returned to the United States. He gave his life for our country just fourth months before V-E day.
He never got to see it.
But he lives on–and so do the rest of my family and friends who put their trust in Christ. Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will never die” (John 11:25).
As I stood by my father’s grave, and thought about the sacrifice that Dick had made for our family and nation, a deep sense of gratitude and resolve rose up within me. There are things worth living and dying for.
Memorial Day reminded me, once again, of that important truth.
All of us who are still alive in this busy and distracted 21st century must slow down, think deeply, andremember.
Especially the heroes God wants us to follow.
