The recent fall from grace of golf star Tiger Woods should be a wake up call to us all. Our attitude should be as evangelist George Whitefield stated during the height of the American Great Awakening: "But for the grace of God, there go I!"

None of us are above it--and all of us could use a new primer course on the importance of self-control. Especially following decades of:

• sex scandals involving numerous politicians (e.g.  Larry Craig - R, and John Edwards - D)
• fallen television evangelists (Jim Bakker and Jimmy Swaggart)
• professional athletes with AIDS (Magic Johnson)
• serial killers (Ted Bundy and the Son of Sam)
• rioting in the streets (Los Angeles and WTO in Seattle)
• abused children, date rapes, battered wives
• and mountains of evidence of an entire culture falling apart.

Our world seems ripe to learn some lessons about self-control.

James Madison, the fourth president of the United States, was amazingly prophetic when he said nearly two hundred years ago: "We have staked the future of American civilization not upon the power of government--far from it. We have staked the future of all of our political institutions upon the capacity of mankind for self-government; upon the capacity of each and all of us to govern ourselves, to control ourselves, to sustain ourselves according to the 10 commandments of God."

Failure to obey God's commands in our daily lives has brought anarchy and havoc. Self-control is a pillar of a free society. According to 2 Peter 1:5-6, Christ-like character begins in the heart with goodness and then goes to the mind through knowledge. Next, it is rooted in the will through self-control. We are told in II Peter 1:6, "To your knowledge, add self-control."

Self-control is sometimes regarded as a negative thing. I'm sure many of you can relate to some of the misconceptions of my early childhood. I remember coming home from school and often being faced with a true test of self-control. As soon as I'd get in the house, I'd be hit with the smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. Racing into the kitchen, there would be a plate of them sitting on the counter. Mom was usually nearby, cleaning up messy pans.  
 
"Don't touch those cookies," she would say. It was like a shot to the stomach. It took all the self-control I could muster to keep my grubby little hands off those cookies. Sometimes, when she left the room, I'd "borrow a cookie." If I got caught, my parents showed me another form of control called "shelf control"--taking a hairbrush to my bottom shelf!

My concept of self-control was backwards. I thought self-control was "resisting temptation or evil." Later in life I discovered that this is not the proper emphasis. Self-control is not primarily resisting wrong. It is possessing right with such conviction that resisting wrong is the natural result.

We're born with a bent toward evil that theologians call moral depravity. Simply stated, it's easy to do wrong. Wrong pulls us along like gravity. Like it's easy to run downhill. The key to going against the pull is a conviction that the hill is worth climbing. When we're committed to holy living, the resistance to temptation becomes an automatic response to a choice already made. That's why goodness in the heart must precede self-control.

One area we must learn the art of self control is in our speech. Our ability to communicate through speech is a wonderful gift. Our words are also one of the places we are most often tested. Who among us is perfect in our words? James says nobody (excluding Jesus).

"We all make many mistakes. If people never said anything wrong, they would be perfect and able to control their entire selves, too. When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can control their whole bodies. Also a ship is very big, and it is pushed by strong winds. But a very small rudder controls that big ship, making it go wherever the pilot wants. It is the same with the tongue. It is a small part of the body, but it brags about great things. A big forest fire can be started with only a little flame. And the tongue is like a fire....The tongue is set on fire by hell, and it starts a fire that influences all of life" (James 3:2-6).

How true. All of us say things we wish we could take back. A friend of mine once said that every time he spoke, he put his foot in his mouth. He opened his mouth again only to change feet.Whether it's taking God's name in vain, lying (including fibs or "little white lies"), speaking before we think, telling jokes at someone else's expense, using sarcasm that hurts, or lashing out in anger, we've all been guilty of not controlling our tongues.

Jesus said in Matthew 12:36 that "God will hold us responsible one day for every careless word we have said." That's a strong enough incentive to make sure that what we say will "always be with grace, seasoned, as it were, with salt, so that you may know how you should respond to each person" (Colossians 4:6).

Begin your development of self-control with the greatest challenge--your speech. Commit yourself to absolute honesty. Be quick to listen and slow to respond. Always seek to build up, never to tear down. You will never be perfect. But you can increase your awareness of the power of words.

Next week we will look at what got Tiger Woods in trouble...